Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I'm in a New York State of Mind

As I drove to work this morning, there was more than the normal amount traffic due to some stormy weather. I listened to the radio and observed the moments of silence in remembrance of those who perished six years ago here in my beautiful NYC. I could swear, that as the last of the four bells chimed in honor of those lost that day, the sky opened up and the rain fell hard and fast, as though the heavens themselves were still weeping for those lost.

I am reminded that although my life is far from perfect, and the lives of my family are more than a little dysfunctional, I thought this would be a good time to step outside of myself and shout out a little gratitude.

Some Grati-tuesday

Although I have many friends and family who work in lower Manhattan, I am so fortunate to have not lost anyone on that frightful Tuesday six years ago.

My town is home to many of New York's finest and bravest and more than a few of the heroes that fell that day were locals. I am honored to have shared a zip code with these fine men.

I have reconnected with a member of my family whom I used consider my little sister. I had wronged her terribly around this same time six years ago, and caused her much pain and sorrow, but she has forgiven me despite that and we are together once again.

I live in a country where I am free to worship whatever G-d I choose, or none at all.I do not have to believe in a war that my country is involved in, but I can be thankful to our soldiers defending my right to feel that way and putting themselves in harms way each and every day to ensure that right for my children and their children.

The mothers and fathers and brothers and sisters of these fine young men and women who surely do not sleep at night, praying for the best, but fearing the worst.

I have changed jobs twice since that terrible Tuesday, each position furthering my career and my bank account. It is good to be an American woman in 2007.

Six years ago today, my Prince was beginning his middle school career. Within two years, he became addicted to a large spectrum of drugs and alcohol. He almost died while huffing inhalants, he has been in drug related fights that had left him with broken bones and spirit, he failed out of school, and almost destroyed himself and those who loved him the most. Today he is anxious to finish high school through home schooling, has completed one and a half years of rehab, he holds a full time job and he is not actively using cocaine to my knowledge. He does not completely embrace recovery, but he is alive and hopeful for the first time in a long time.

I am learning that I can not control the feelings, actions or behaviors of those around me. I am learning to let go. I am willing to accept progress not perfection.

I live in a place that was irrevocably changed six years ago today. I saw firsthand the destruction and pain that was caused by hate and ignorance. I also saw firsthand, an entire city, and an entire country stand together that day in unity, brought together by a madman. And we are still standing.

May G-d bless America.


Anonymous said...


Beth said...


Tab said...

Beautifully shared Kel.
I love you.
Tab xo

pat said...

Well written, Kel. I agree. May God continue to Bless America.

Mary Christine said...

The whole world changed that day.

Lea-chan said...

Thanks for posting this. It dug me out of my Tokyo state of mind and brought me back to where I come from, if just for a few minutes.

Tab said...

Stopping by to leave you some love on your porch here ..xo Tabster

MICKY said...

You know, the message the 12 Step Paradigm tells us that we are all just powerless over our addictions, meaningless specks of offal in an endless ocean of space and matter where hydrogen atoms and bacteria of unexplained origin can turn into god as you understand him!! Oooo! It’s so exciting and uplifting to be regularly assured by Steppers in all their ineffable knowledge and function is just an accumulation of 1st Century Christianity Buchmanism & Nihilism. Oooo! It’s heart-warming, I’ll tell ya. We owe these "messengers" so terribly much that it is difficult to put into words... We can talk to dead people & consult spiritists.
9 When you enter the land the LORD your God is giving you, do not learn to imitate the detestable ways of the nations there. 10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifice his son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, 11 or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. 12 Anyone who does these things is detestable to the LORD, and because of these detestable practices the LORD your God will drive out those nations before you. 13 You must be blameless before the LORD your God [Deuteronomy 18: 9-13]
Wilson was a “detestable necromancer” who talked to dead people & consulted spiritists. He was “an angel of light” and if you Steppers want what he had, keep going to 12 Step meetings & end up as zombies. I beg of you to see the True Light [John 3: 16] & have Eternal Life, not death [12 Steps].
Peace Be With You

MICKY said...

I imagine 12 STEPPERS have sold their souls to the devil. Fortunately, I was saved through the power of Jesus Christ, but for many years had been exposed to the evil “satanic cult” (Alcoholics Anonymous) Wilson (AA) has prostituted himself & deluded many thousands (12 Step Groups) by worshipping the god Moloch (Ba’al the Sacred Bull). It all started with his (Wilson) “drug induced hallucination”…. Here are references to seances and other psychic events….
Bill would…”get” these things …long sentences, word by word would come through….” (22)
, he asked for guidance….The words began tumbling out with astonishing speed….(23) So A.A.’s 12 Steps were actually received verbatim from the demonic world. It is not surprising, then, that the effect of A.A. upon many of its members is to lead them into occult involvement. In 1958, Wilson wrote to Sam Shoemaker, Throughout A.A., we find a large amount of psychic phenomena, nearly all of it spontaneous. Alcoholic after alcoholic tells me of such experiences… run nearly the full gamut of everything we see in the books. In addition to my original mystical experience, I’ve had a lot of such phenomenalism myself.(24)
Wilson’s “original mystical experience” was his alleged “conversion” –a classic occult encounter: “Suddenly the room lit up with a great white light. I was caught up into an ecstasy…it burst upon me that I was a free man…a wonderful feeling of Presence, and I thought to myself, ‘So this is the God of the preachers! ‘ A great peace stole over me….”(25)
This was not the “God of the preachers” but the one who transforms himself “into an angel of light” (2 Cor 1l:l4)-a light that often transforms those involved in the occult. The experience was so profound that Wilson never touched alcohol again. Satan would he more than willing to deliver a man from alcoholism in this life if thereby he could ensnare him for eternity and inspire him to lead millions to the same destruction! Wilson joined the Oxford Group and regularly attended its meetings at Calvary Church (NY), pastored by Episcopalian Sam Shoemaker. Shoemaker urged his hearers to “accept God however they might conceive of him….”(26) Here was the origin of Step 3’s “God as we understood him.” God does not respond to those who call upon false gods. Jesus said, “And this is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent” (Jn 17:3). God’s judgment comes upon them “that know not God, and that obey not the gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ (2 Thes 1:8).
I will set my face against that man & his family & will cut off from their people both him & all who follow him in prostituting themselves to Molech. I will set my face against the person who turns to mediums & spiritists to prostitute himself by following them, & I will cut him off from his people. (Leviticus 20: 5, 6)
Moloch the God Ba’al, the Sacred Bull, was widely worshipped in the ancient Near East and wherever Carthaginian culture extended. Baal Moloch was conceived under the form of a calf or an ox or depicted as a man with the head of a bull.
Hadad, Baal or simply the King identified the god within his cult. The name Moloch is not the name he was known by among his worshippers, but a Hebrew Moloch (in the Septuagint Greek translation of the Old Testament), or Molech (Hebrew), is no different than the word Melech or king, transformed by interposing the vowels of bosheth or ’shameful thing’. translation. The written form. He is sometimes also called Milcom in the Old Testament. I beg you KEL, to to get out while you can (12 Step) or end up as SHAPE SHIFTING REPTILE?
Peace Be With You

Syd said...

Mickey has been active here. Thanks Kel for your thoughts and feelings.