Tuesday, May 29, 2007

She just wants to love herself...

The Prince did take off on Thursday, but guess what... HE GOT A JOB!!! He started working at a local marine shop. He will do be doing inventory, stock work, etc. He started Friday afternoon and he worked all weekend. In celebration of Memorial Day weekend, the store was serving hot dogs and refreshments outside all weekend and that's what he did. He called me Saturday morning telling me to come and visit him and have a hot dog. I don't think I have ever felt so much pride in my whole life as seeing my Prince standing out there giving out free hot dogs. He is working every day after his program and all weekend. He is like a different person, like he has a purpose now. I am very proud of him.

I met someone at a BBQ this weekend who started out in NA and now goes to AA. He has been clean and sober for 17 years. He was deeply into coke and heroin, speed balls specifically and drinking. He had done 6 tries in rehab, was thrown out of his family home at the age of 17, lived on the streets, did some prison time, and is now running a multi million dollar family business with a beautiful wife and three lovely daughters. We spoke at length and he was able to provoke the Prince into a conversation when he stopped by after work. (Sorry, I just love saying the Prince and work in the SAME sentence). He did not think it was wise that I was going to NA with the Prince and could not have been more adamant about me going to Al-Anon. Now. Immediately. As Soon As Possible. He left the BBQ to go to a meeting and when he returned, he told me he spoke to his sponsor about me and they were going to get me the local Al-Anon meeting list and get me going. He also told the Prince how he preferred AA to NA as he sees more long term sobriety in AA then he ever saw in NA. He offered to take him to a meeting and he gave him his phone number, and that he can and should call... any time, for any reason, but especially before picking up a drink or using.

I love AA and NA and all of it's members. I am not so sure my son is ready to embrace a program yet, but I know that I am. Everyone I have met to date that is in the rooms (blogger peeps included) is just so willing to help and embrace those of us that need it in regard to this disease. To date, every one who has any experience living with this awful disease in one way or another, has offered me the same advice- get myself to a meeting.

So tonight I am going to try to attend an Al-Anon meeting or an Nar-Anon meeting. There is one of each equal distance from my home. It will be a far more effective way of spending my evening rather than laying in bed feeling sorry for myself and angry at the AH the way I usually do.

Thank you all for listening.


pat said...

Good for you. They say to attend at least six meetings before making a choice whether or not to work with the program. Being with other people who have experienced the same pain makes you realize you are not alone. You Are Not Alone. Always remember that even in your darkest moments.

ME, myself, & I said...

good deal. Enjoy the journey.

Tab said...

What a positively good vibe post Kel! Your friend is right..Your Prince is better off attending life on his own terms and that includes NA or any other form of support for himself.Bet that is why the Prince wanted you to come on down for a hot dog...kind of like a kid on a swing.."look at me Mom!" lol..that is great :)

Now that leaves you just finding what works for YOU and when you do little missy..well just you wait and see how it helps everyone! lol

I tried Al-Anon and Coda meetings and found it just wasnt' right for me.I do read Al-Anon lit every single morning with my Language of Letting go and find the combo book reading everday gives me a whole lof of hope and courage to see things through one day at a time.
And the Steps are great too when you let in a little humility and give'em a whirl.You do not have to be a Twelve Stepper per say to find wisdom in those steps but they are most effective when shared with another person who has done them also.I shared a lot of step work with my Mom..
(she was an Al-Anoner)

The program lit is really down to earth and I wish more people wouldn't be so fucking hung up on the god factor as though it is a religion or cult.Ugh..it is open to
the god of your understanding.
My HP is Nature.Yours maybe something else,to each their own.

Kel and I cannot express enough how deeply moved I am to read you are doing something in way of what may work for YOU :)

Big hugs to you ..and a cupcake too xo